Crack-How it changes a person….

We once knew this guy named Gerry twenty years ago he was so handsome and every girl wanted to be near him.  So much has changed for Gerry and it is very sad really.  He went from being a handsome, smart, sweet guy to a man who is falling apart from his addiction to crack.

My aunt Trish had always been a very close friend of Gerry’s, even trying to take him in to her home about twenty years ago to help him.  At that point he was just experimenting with pot and booze and sometimes coke, but most people could see he was choosing the wrong path in life.

Every once in a while my aunt would run into Gerry, but for me I haven’t seen him in a good twenty years.  Last week we were sitting on my aunt’s porch and I saw this scary, dirty, long haired, no teethed man riding a bike.  I commented on how sad it was to see someone like that in that bad of a shape obviously from drugs. 

Trish quickly told me that who we were looking at was Gerry!  I couldn’t believe my eyes, I was so saddened by this information I actually wanted to cry.  Trish told me it was so bad that he had lost all of his teeth due to drugs, his hair was falling out, his face was concaved and he also talks to himself.  He looked over at us sitting there and threw us a wave.

Seeing him quickly reminded Trish about an incident that happened in the past month with Gerry.  Trish told me one morning she was going out to her truck (which is parked in the lane behind her house) to run some errands. She was getting her keys ready head down trying to find the right button on the clicker and sees a set of legs sticking out from under her truck.  She screams and jumps back two feet swearing and at the same moment the man crawls out from under the truck saying “Trish, Trish it’s me Gerry, I was just hanging out here don’t panic”.  :Trish I’m not doing nothing I’m not touching your truck”.  Trish, just having the shit scared out of her yells at him “I don’t give a shit that it’s you Gerry you dumb ass, what if I didn’t see you there and ran you the hell over”?

She then started yelling and lecturing him all at the same moment, quickly realizing that nothing is going to help this sad excuse for a man.  He is lost, gone, no longer even a quarter of what he used to be.  The sadness overwhelmed her as she told him to get out and not to come back again.  She was taken back to a time where this man was so much and had so much to offer the world, yet look at him now.  He lower his head, nodded and with that he was on his way out of the lane, crack pipe held tightly in his hand. 

Trish has told me how much she would love to help Gerry but knows that he is too far gone.  Finding him under her truck and invading her space like that was just too much.  Having a sister that is a crack addict, she knows that if she allows Gerry to feel like he can be close to her that she just may find him sleeping on the porch next time. 

 

Beckie

Meeting the Ex.

Meeting the Ex.

I had been told the Ex was a crackhead that was trying to get clean. She had been out of Jack and the kids lives for a couple of years and was now trying to mend the relationship between her and the kids. To me that sounded great, boy was I wrong. So meeting the Ex……interesting to say the least. She catches wind of me being present in my boyfriend’s life and wants to meet me, yet every time I hear him talking to her on the phone I can hear her screaming and yelling like a nut case. I was a little uncomfortable with the thought of meeting her. Boy was I ever in for a treat.

Finally after seeing my boyfriend for a few weeks I go over to HIS house and meet the ex. Unbelievably she is fantastic to me, inviting me for drinks and food…. I of coarse find this very interesting considering this is HIS house HIS food and HIS booze and not hers odd but friendly. It was almost like I was dating her brother or something. How messed up is that? Her boyfriend was also present and having a grand old time with my Jack’s booze and food.

Sitting in Jack’s small kitchen the crackhead her boyfriend Jack and I talking about nothing yet I could feel the tension building. I have to say I found this all a little strange but I was thinking that it is also pretty cool that everyone gets along…. Ha, that’s what I thought. It took about two hours and a few coolers before the crack head in her came out. As soon as she saw my hand reach for my boyfriends hand or if our eyes met and we smiled at each other that was it for her. Her head would be twitching like a clucking chicken.

Basically the next few hours consisted of the EX trying to pick a fight with my Jack. Over the kids over his drinking over anything…..but really it was over me. Sadly she felt threatened by me.
Was I ever in for a world of culture shock…..I was definitely not prepared for this kind of behavior from anyone. Wishing that seeing her would be at a minimal was just that, wishful thinking. From that moment on all of our relationships together would be toxic. I would come to see Jack and Crackhead would show up. Speaking to me with a smile on her face I could still feel the tension, her teeth gritting having to speak to me so nicely. I decided to come on Wednesday’s, so she decided to come on Wednesday’s. You have to remember this is a woman who was hardly ever here till I showed up on the scene. Most times all would be ok at first till the end of the evening and basically Crackhead and her mate would end up leaving in the midst of a screaming match.

I was well aware that when I was not around Crackhead would try to convince Jack that he shouldn’t be with me. Crackhead was always calling me all sorts of names when I wasn’t around all combinations of names consistently having the word FAT in it. When Jack and I were with his kids she would call his phone constantly screaming and swearing forever driving him out of his mind. I started getting closer with the daughter and that was a not a good thing as far as Crackhead was concerned. Crackhead didn’t like that at all she felt very threatened by me. I am sure it’s because she feels inadequate as a mother.

I have to say his being threatened by me bothers me to my soul. This woman says I am trying to mother her kids yet when she used to come over here she would spend time with Jack and I in the kitchen acting like a maniac. One time we came home to find her here at Jack’s house and we decided to stay across the street with my aunt. Crackhead marches across the street to ask us to come over to Jack’s place for a few drinks. We both quickly tell her that we are staying across the street so that she can spend time with her children. Trust me she was not too impressed that we didn’t immediately follow her across the street. If she is so upset with me getting too close to her kids why is she more interested in Jack and me coming over to visit with her?

I myself have left my sons to live with their father and he has a girlfriend that is fantastic with my kids. Why would I have a problem with this? She is being kind and gently with my kids and as a mother I appreciate that very much. She felt I was taking her kids away from her and started bad mouthing me to the daughter. The things that she said to this 13 year old little girl were unbelievable. She was talking about me and Jack having sex, saying that she is no longer her mother because now I was. The poor child has been through enough having her mother leave her and her brother behind. Now this is what I have to deal with …..Help me god.